Skint Monkey

My day with Grandma started off with her refusing to go to the annual family reunion.  She insisted that it was rude to show up at a family reunion without any food.  She didn't fix anything and therefore it was horrible that I was making her go.

The conversation:

Grandma:  "You just can't go to a reunion without food."
Me:  "Grandma, it is ok.  Brenda fixed everything."
Grandma:  "Have you lost your mind?"
Me:  "Nope."  (Thinking..she has.)
Grandma:  "Who raised you?"
Me:  "Brenda and Gary"
Grandma:  "You don't have much sense.  You do not show up at a reunion without food."
Me:  "Fine.  Tell Gary to take you to KFC and get some chicken."
Grandma:  "Hmmph."

I told her that her hair needed to be fixed.  She said ok.  The first time I fixed her hair, she looked at it and said:  "I look like a skint monkey."  She meant skinned monkey.

So, we took it down and fixed her hair again.  This time I teased it a little to give it some poof.  She repeated that she looked like a skint monkey.  I tried to fix it several times and then she grabbed the brush and told me that I didn't know what I was doing.  I said fine.

She fixed her hair and mumbled the entire time.  I left the room to get ready.  When I returned, she had half her hair up and half of it down.  I told her that it looked great.  She told me she wasn't going to a family reunion looking like a skint monkey.